Be Different or be dead

March 25, 2019

9 easy ways to get out of the gigantic rut you’re in

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9 easy ways to get out of the gigantic rut you’re in.

“I’m in a rut and I just can’t seem to get out of it”. How many times have you heard someone say it? How many times have you said it?

I’m not a psychologist, and there are many who prescribe solutions to this problem.

I’m a business guy, writer and grandparent who, like all of you, has fallen victim to ‘the rut’ from time, and have had to figure out how to escape. I hope what worked for me will be useful to you.

In my experience, it’s not unusual to get stuck. Your work can sometimes fall into a mechanical routine and your personal life can fall victim to lacklustre days of same-old same-old.

And the rut isn’t so bad; it’s comfortable settling in to a routine. When you’re stuck, you’re not particularly challenged because repetition dictates your activities ; it’s low risk and you just float along.

But after a while, the comfortable turns into the frustrating and annoying; what was once a peaceful place to be suddenly becomes somewhere you anxiously want to exit.

When you find yourself trapped by momentum you no longer find gratifying, it’s time for a self-intervention.

These steps helped me manage my rut experience(s) and achieve productive outcomes.

Reflect: how bad is it really?

So you’re caught in a vortex and you can’t see anyway out. The problem is that your emotions take over and dictate the severity of the entrapment you feel, but emotions aren’t always the best judge of how really bad it is.

It might FEEL like you’re suffocating but in reality you may be catching your breath now and then.

So before you hit your OMG! button, take a time out and do a reality check on your situation. Make sure it’s really a rut you’re in before you start trying to climb out.

Maybe it’s time

The experience you’re having could be a blessing in disguise. It’s possible that up until now you’ve been unaware that you’ve been stuck. When the current has you, it’s difficult to think of anything but going with it.

So rejoice over the fact that at least you now you realize it’s time to shake off the dust from the past and move on. Discomfort is an amazing motivator and guide if you listen to it.

Examine what has changed

Something changed that made you dissatisfied with the direction you were on.
Before you can take any remedial action, you must understand the dynamics at play. There’s a reason you now feel you’re in a rut that you don’t like and you need to understand it.

You can’t fix or change it if you don’t know what likely caused it. Look at any recent life event — family, financial, career, health — because they can dramatically shift your thinking and cause you to rethink how you’ve been living your life.

Talk to friends

Get the views of your closest allies on what’s going on with you. They may have valuable insights on what’s causing your discontent, and they may be able to offer potential solutions.

Third party engagement is quite often extremely effective because we simply are unable to spot what’s wrong in us; we’re embedded in ourselves and often too close to be objective to see our problem.

Do some research

You’re not likely the only person who has been in your situation; the rut you’re in has probably been occupied by someone else at some point.
So do some research and find out what’s out there on your dilemma.

Social media is a good source to explore what others have gone through; Google your situation as well and you will get plenty of information to ponder.

Get enough sleep

You need your sleep to figure out what needs changing; you can’t solve any problem when your body is sleep deprived.

This may seem like a small issue but it’s not. Changing momentum requires intense emotional energy which cannot be produced from a tired body.
Take care of yourself and be able to do the tough work required.

Think!

Getting unstuck requires innovative thinking which means you need to do things that gets your creative juices flowing.

Sitting in your chair won’t create the kind of possibilities you need; perhaps taking early morning walks — in any weather — might.

The point is to find an activity you like and one that stimulates your thought process and start doing it regularly. See what new thinking you can create to check out of rutsville.

Check your bucket list

Everyone has an inventory of things they would like to do kif only they could’; so now its time to turn some of your dreams into reality.
Use your bucket lists as a source of ideas to get un-stuck, but choose wisely.

Resist the temptation to go for the big idea necessarily right away; perhaps a series of short term changes will produce the behaviour necessary for you to get un-stuck and STAY un-stuck.

Have a plan

Take the time to document the choices you feel you have to escape your rut. Write them down because they have more serious intent than idle thoughts about what you COULD do.
If they’re “on paper” they have more permanence.

The discipline of recording your thoughts and potential choices is very productive in terms of clarifying your options and the intent of each.
And quite often new ideas are borne as you go through the diarizing process.

Your plan should include pros and cons of each choice you’re facing so you have a good basis to compare them with one another before you decide on which one to take.

And once you’ve made your decision, develop an implementation plan to monitor your progress — include elements such as WHAT to do and WHEN to have it done.

And define what success looks like when you have done your work; it’s important to know when you’ve arrived at your out-of-rut destination.

Take baby steps

Don’t be too aggressive with your change goals; baby steps are needed. You didn’t get into your rut overnight and you can’t expect to get out of it overnight.

I always had success by “chunking” any change process into small discrete steps. I would achieve one; pat myself on the back then achieve another until complete change was made.

You might be stuck or you might not be. But if you are, these steps hopefully will start you with the tools necessary to get out until the next time.

Cheers,
Roy
Check out my BE DiFFERENT or be dead Book Series

• Posted 3.25.19 at 05:21 am by Roy Osing
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March 8, 2019

5 simple ways to impress your future employer with your online presence

It is no secret that employers regularly investigate the social media presence of many potential hires before any offers are made. This has given rise to many people being terrified of posting anything even mildly controversial or making any mention of their personal lives.

While it’s understandable that hateful remarks will get you fired, not posting anything will also do harm.
Not only are you depriving your family and friends of opportunities to share in your successes and support you in your challenges, but you are denying potential employers an opportunity to get to know the kind of person they will be hiring.

When used well, social media can be a better way to land a job than traditional job searching. Having the courage to show potential employers (and everyone else) who you really are can help you stand out from the crowd.

Here are 5 simple things you can do today to impress future employers with your online presence.

1. Protest Thoughtfully

There may be some companies that are legitimately looking for someone that will never express a strong opinion about anything, but chances are good you probably wouldn’t want to work for them anyway.

The truth is, most businesses are looking for people who are passionate, because passionate people generally make concerned, dedicated employees.
What they are also looking for, however, are intelligent employees who don’t just jump on the latest bandwagon and parrot whatever talking head they agree with the most. There is nothing wrong with making thoughtful commentary on causes you are passionate about.

Doing so shows future employers you are capable of engaging in “hot button” discussions with thoughtfulness, tact, and diplomacy. And who doesn’t want that in an employee?

2. Browse Through Your Social Media Content And Ask If You Would Hire You Based On What You See

Remember that recruiters and potential employers are not the only ones looking at your social media accounts, and they likely have very little access anyway.
Who is looking at your full profiles are dozens of friends and acquaintances that might already be working at a company you are interested in working for.

Not everyone you are connected with on social media knows you personally. In some cases, all they know about you is what they see on social media. If the impression they get is of someone who lives a full life, they might be inclined to pass on your resume to hiring managers and recruiters.

Browse through your profiles and ask yourself what kind of impression you might form of you if you only knew you through social media.

3. Be Real

Some people become so concerned with how potential employers might view their social media content that their profiles become flat, boring and lifeless - they follow all those guides on how to have the perfect social media profile that would make you employable.

You know what’s wrong with all of those guides? They aren’t you. They are general guides that just make an army of clones. 

The truth is, human beings are complex and everyone is quirky in their own way.

Jennifer Lawrence is just as famous for constantly tripping on the red carpet as she is for her fierce work ethic. Being a hard worker is great, but it’s also important to be likable.

Your coworkers and even bosses may have to spend long hours working with you, so they might be just as drawn to someone who looks fun to be around as someone who just has all the right skills.

4. Highlight What Makes You Right For The Job You Want

Think of your social media profiles as a fuller, richer version of your resume. If you want to be a travel writer, but have no photos of yourself traveling anywhere, you’re probably not going to get hired just to receive on-the-job training.

That doesn’t mean you can’t get a job in an area where you have no experience, but you want your profiles to at least communicate why you would be a good fit for the job you are looking for.

The motto “dress for the job you want, not the job you have” can also be applied to social media profiles. For instance, working in a telecommuting position is a great opportunity to share your insights on how it truly is to work from home.
Post a photo of your home office and showcase your dedicated workspace - it shows your future employers that you are disciplined, a self-starter, and know how to organize your daily tasks.

5. Share Both Your Work Challenges And Victories

Everyone’s job is going to offer challenges that need to be overcome in order to succeed. In the above telecommuting example, that would mean you should share and teach others that working from home has good and bad sides - and how to overcome the bad ones.

Many people are afraid to share these challenges on social media because they are afraid they will come across as weak or negative. The truth is, however, most employers would love to see how you deal with and overcome challenges.

Letting others know may also give them inspiration to better deal with their own. If you are having difficulties at work, such as feeling bullied by a coworker, you can use your social media outlets to maturely discuss what this person is doing, how it makes you feel and the steps you are taking to deal with the situation.

The likelihood is, if you address the situation calmly, rationally and maturely, you will most likely see a positive outcome at some point.
If you share about that too, you show potential employers (and even friends and acquaintances that may have the ability to put your name in front of potential employers) that you know how to handle workplace challenges well.
That quality may be far more attractive to an employer than your ability to create a comprehensive spreadsheet from scratch.

Bottom line is that your social media presence is becoming more and more important to building a career.

While you don’t necessarily have to have an active social media presence to get a job, having a great one can give you a competitive edge in a wide range of fields.

— Ashley Wilson is a digital nomad and freelance writer from San Diego, California. When she is not busy baking cupcakes, Ashley loves writing about business, digital marketing, and finance. Connect with Ashley via Twitter

• Posted 3.8.19 at 04:28 am by Roy Osing
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March 4, 2019

5 reasons why the most popular things are wrong

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Popular ideas, popular gadgets and popular people have always been the objects of our affection; thriving industries have been built around attracting people to popularity niches — the tabloids are obvious examples of businesses targeted at people who “worship” celebrities from all walks of life and who are prepared to pay to read about their exploits regardless of their truth.

Everyone looks for what’s trendy; trendiness is cool and if you jump on the “What’s Trending” bandwagon, you get identified with the trend — YOU are cool.

But there is a dark side to popularism that rarely is talked about; popularity results in behaviour that is inconsistent with developing creative and innovative individuals and organizations — and taken to the extreme, society as a whole.

Popularity is bordering on being toxic notion; here are 5 reasons why:

Popularity fashions crowd formation

Anything popular builds a crowd. Whatever’s trending sucks people in and it’s value is measured by how many views the video gets or how many Retweets and Likes the post gets.

What individual value is created by being in a crowd? Other than sporting a Rolling Stones T-Shirt that a million other people have, what exactly does the crowd inspire in me to exercise my personal identity — the unique characteristics that make me “special”?

When you are in a crowd there is no motivation to be yourself; the “rub-off factor” from what is popular is a stimulant to share a view held by the many rather than express your own personal perspective.

Popularity grows the crowd of common thinking; it espouses the same ideas and the result is a larger herd whose members all think the same.
We don’t need more crowds formed by popularism; we desperately need stimuli that encourages individualism.

Popularity feeds sameness

Under the guise of being cool, popularity encourages people to adopt the behaviour and views of others whether it be a rock star, celebrity model or fringe ideology group.
This adoption breeds a culture of people who seek likeness; who feel more comfortable sharing someone else’s DNA rather than living their own.

A successful product idea captures the imagination of other marketers; an amazing wardrobe ensemble smites the collective adulation of young people and an innovative operating system model is a magnet for engineers regardless of the business they’re in.

Crowd members are captured by a force they must capitulate to rather than seek their own way.

Cultivating sameness has no long term value; it breeds a population of lookalikes who operate within boundaries established by others. Value for ourselves and for people around us is delivered by spirits who are different and who shine by being special.

Popularity prevents risk taking

When a person imitates what’s popular they tend to feel that their risk exposure is minimized; in fact many populist followers think they have no risk at all.
They believe any personal risk they do incur is spread out among everyone else who shares the same idea, so their share is minimal.
And even if the populist notion is a bust they can always take comfort in the fact that many others have gone down with them.

Populist conformity not only mitigates personal risk, it has an even darker downside — it mutes innovation and creativity. Amazing thinks happen when people assume risk; conversely, mediocrity results when risk is avoided.

Ergo, behaviour which bows down to popularity and subordinates individual thought and expression results in nothing interesting at all and that’s a HUGE risk to it only the individual but also to society.

Popularity kills originality

Following a popular anything removes any incentive to look, say or do anything different from the trend. In fact while in the popular herd, stepping out and doing anything that is not a aligned with the trend isn’t even a thought — there is zero motivation to do so when you are caught up in the energy of the movement.

Crowd members fall easily into the copycat mentality and they copy everything that is associated with their popular infatuation. And they think they’re being original; doing or thinking things that people outside the popular circle don’t.

Copying is the enemy of innovation and creativity; it serves no purpose other than to #metoo someone else.

We don’t need copycats in today’s world of intense competition for everything; we need people who hate the notion and find it repugnant because it’s an easy way out of the tough job of doing something truly original.

Popularity steals your future

The opportunity costs associated with following what is popular are higher than anyone can imagine.
While you are coveting what is popular, you are losing the precious energy and time you need to do something special; something that will define your unique signature in the world.

If you are devoted to chasing what is “in” at the moment, you need to be comfortable with the prospects of an unexciting future; one that is defined by finding someone else’s way rather than your own.

And the irony is you don’t even know the people behind the popular movement that controls you — crazy!
Successful individuals devote themselves to exploring the art of the impossible.

It’s ok to dabble in popularity; trends have a habit of embracing us, capturing our imagination and imprinting our opinions and behaviour.

But at the end of the day, popular things should be treated as a temporal aberration — a fling that doesn’t detract you from your ultimate goal of creating your own personal and unique value for the world.

Cheers,
Roy
Check out my BE DiFFERENT or be dead Book Series

• Posted 3.4.19 at 03:16 am by Roy Osing
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February 25, 2019

5 courageous demands to make of your leader right now

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5 courageous demands to make of your leader right now.

To move beyond your current role requires a personal development plan; it’s not likely that serendipity will play a significant role in advancing our careers.
It’s all about positioning yourself to take advantage of either an opportunity that comes up or one that you create because of proactive moves you make.

Step up and demand

Either way, there are a few key things you should discuss with your leader to enable you to capitalize on your potential and prepare you for further career success.
After all, they are supposed to be there to help you get both your performance and developmental needs met, so be courageous and tell them what they are even if they don’t ask.

Most leaders don’t ask “How can I help?”, they just expect you to do the job without their intervention.
But don’t play that game. It’s your career and life and you have every right to tell your boss what you need to improve your performance and to prepare you to make even greater contributions to the organization.

Ask your leader:

To give you more work

To delegate more tasks to do within your current role.
Tell them that you have the capacity to take on more (even if you are not sure you have) and are prepared to do so.

I’m sure there is a project on the shelf not being actioned that interests you or a deliverable you think should be worked on that would help the organization; show initiative ask if you can take it on even if you put yourself at risk in the process.

My personal style was always to define the job I was in by expanding the scope of deliverables I produced. I rarely accepted the boundaries of the role I was given because I considered them too restrictive.
Most people need defined boundaries for them to do their job; I never did.

In a marketing product manager role, for example, I asked to assume the task of defining and implementing the customer service support requirements necessary to sustain a product in the field. In the process, I not only was able to deliver a high performing product that met its sales targets, I also learned a great deal about the service world which prepared me for a career path in operations.

To define your line of sight

Effective execution of the strategic game plan of the organization requires that each function and individual know exactly what their role is; the game plan must be translated in very granulated form down to what each person needs to do in their job to ensure the plan is implemented the way it was intended.

For example, if the game plan was to beat the competition by outperforming them on serving customers, everyone needs to understand what they need to do to help the organization deliver miraculous service moments.

When line of sight is foggy and people don’t know their role, they invent what they think it should be and dysfunction sets in. There is no consistency in what people do and results are all over the map.

So, ask your boss to sit down with you and map what the game plan of the organization specifically means to you. What do you need to do differently? Agreement on this is critical to ensure performance expectations are the same between boss and employee and to move the game plan forward.

To make introductions for you

Career success depends heavily on the network of people you know; not just the number of them but their quality in terms of their relevance to your chosen career path.

It’s cool to be introduced to a VP Finance but it would be even more cool if you were headed to a marketing role to meet a few VPs of Marketing.

In addition, see if you can get introduced to people who you have something in common with. Do your homework and ask for introductions to specific people.
But don’t expect your leader to commit to you and provide you with quality referrals immediately. They need to get to know you and trust your capabilities. This takes time so be prepared to make the investment and that you deliver beyond their expectations.

What new stuff you should learn

Career growth requires constant learning and leaders are an excellent source of advice on how to fill your knowledge gaps.

They see your performance and should be the best people to offer suggestions to help you improve. In addition, they have experience that you don’t and can refer you to learning sources based on what worked for them.

Their involvement in the organization’s strategic game plan also enables them to have an accurate perspective on what skills and competencies are needed to add the value that spells success in the marketplace. Take your lead from the new knowledge what they suggest you acquire.

To help prepare you for a lateral move

Success isn’t just about moving up. Rarely do people look back on their journey with a record of only promotions.
In my experience the most valuable moves I made involved accepting a lateral position to a different department. This gave me a broader perspective on what the organization needed to succeed and was a brilliant source of learning.

When promotions did present themselves, I received more serious consideration because of the more diversified experience.
So ask your boss to find a niche lateral move that would complement your long term career goals and pester her until you get it.

Don’t expect your leader to do the right thing for your career. If you don’t put YOU in front of them they will likely have other priorities.

You must take ownership of your own fate; tell them what you need.

Cheers,
Roy
Check out my BE DiFFERENT or be dead Book Series

• Posted 2.25.19 at 02:15 am by Roy Osing
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